Running fast & crying hard...

yesterday I ran fast...and cried hard
It felt good...and I ran for a long time, I ran 5 1/2 miles and then I ran another mile or so up a mountain...and sat and cried...

And all I can say, is that all of you precious people that offered to send me some "love blessings".....you have no idea what a blessing and what precious people you are to my heart...I never asked for help...but you all extended your caring hands and loving hearts to help me....I want to say thank you from the deepest part of my heart...I feel like we are all in this together...and I don't feel so alone! My heart is sending you the biggest hugs....i heart you all!

THE HAPPIEST PART OF MY DAY YESTERDAY:
Somehow I stumbled upon a live broadcast channel, where everyone could see me on the video chat...it wasn't the best, so everyone told me to go to BLOGtv...which did...and I think we had over 300 viewers watching and chatting with me live and asking questions....and everyone got to meet Jordan...it was so fun, and it was so hard to want to stop....I would've stayed ont here for hours if I didn't need to take a shower so badly!

Thank you everyone that was on there and shared their love and awesome words...It was one of the most fun things I've done in a long time! I can't wait to do it again. Stay posted to my twitter:
www.twitter.com/kandeejohnson , i can do a post about when I'll be going on. And on my facebook to probably...
IF YOU GO TO www.blogtv.com, then my username is: kandeejohnson
and then you'll get to interact with me live, like we're just hanging out! IT was so fun....thank you all for giving me a bright spot in my kinda sad day!
i heart you all...

I'm filming some airbrush make-up videos today, with Dinair....I'm so excited!!!! Tell you about it later! huge love, kandee

I've never felt like this...

I just want to say thank you to all of you who donated money to help me get an attorney...you have no idea that each penny is like the biggest, sparkly blessing to me...and feels like a million dollars! I am so blessed to have amazing souls like each one of you, that see the good in life and people, and have the most amazing hearts! I heart each of you!

I had a hard time even thinking last night..., before I went to bed, I read all your amazing, love-filled words you left me in my comments on here and on facebook. You have no idea what kind of heart healing power our words have.

I wanted to cry and scream last night....as one of my friends said they went somewhere, and people were talking about me. People that don't even know anything about me...they had all probably just gone to my blog and youtube to "research" me that day. The article that they published, which is just filled with lies and false accusations, and all the evil comments people left, that don't have any clue what is really going on. Somebody said, "yeah she lives in a nice house that the taxpayers pay for"....I can't even believe someone would make up such a lie. I was going to go to the store last night, and I didn't even end up going because I didn't want to see any of these people, that have now seen my picture that the printed! So awful...

I work so hard to take care of me and my kids...I'll be up all night editing videos, sending emails, working all day long....trying to work while I make snacks, play with my little people, clean the house! I am so angry that these people that have no clue about me are saying such ridiculous things...they are so inaccurate...and to think that this newspaper would print this, without it being fact is awful!!!

I got a Jury Duty Letter in the mail yesterday, and as I read it, sitting in my car, a pink piece of paper fell out...it said, "keep ya head up girl. You are more loved than you can imagine. You are blessed".....the more loved than you can imagine is what I always say..."you're more beautiful than you now, more talented than you think, and more loved than you can imagine!"...instantly tears began pouring down my face...and even as I type this, they are overfilling my eyes...
Whoever sent me that note in the Jury letter....thank you so much! It was like a tiny sign of love from out of no where...

If you missed the story, you can go back to the post about Why I was in court.....
thank you everyone for your awesome heart support...i love you all, and tears can't help but spill out of my eyes when I feel all your love.


thank you so much for everything...your words make my heart feel so much better...a teary eyed, kandee

your hearts and help...

i want to thank you all so much...
today has been really not very good for me...a newspaper posted a story about the charges I am facing... No one even realizes that these are just charges...the things they are "charging" me with aren't even true...My son WAS NOT home alone for 3 days, along with all the other ridiculous things that I haven't even be able to go to court over....people were commenting all these awful things, that "I'm a loser", that I shouldn't have kids.....all of these awful things are just tearing my heart apart...to hear such horrible things said, that are so far from the truth! These people don't even know how untrue and ridiculous these "charges" are!

Then one of the commenters went as far as saying they "researched" me and found my blogs...and said that the taxpayers are paying for my house....I work day and night, trying to take care of my kids...I am in no way on any kind of welfare or assistance!! I am so overwhelmed and angry, and sad....I feel like I can't even cry.

Some of you have the sweetest hearts and have offered to help me try to get an attorney...you don't know what a gift this is to my heart....you are all the sweetest people in the world...and I thank any of you that want to donate even your pocket change! Thank you so much!!!! The lady at the court told me to just come and defend myself in court, because I couldn't afford one.

hair did's and hidden treasures in manure....

this me-
with my hair up...wearing my fav silver chain from Forever 21...earring from the "21" also!

I will post the hair video below....but right before I do....

I wanted to tell you...so I was having a crappy day the other day, with my court case and all...it's still in the back of my mind...but, that day, later in the night I realized!!! "Lo and behold, I haven't checked my emails today!".......man, my day was crappo-----and then I see my "inbox" was full of good news and opportunities...
I hate this part, becuase I want to share everything with you guys as soon as I find out...you're lie my family!!! And some of these I have to wait to talk about, for some reason or another!

But what I CAN say: is that sometimes our life seems real "poopy"....and that is exactly when the most beautiful "flowers" of wonder can grow....the most beautiful flowers grow out of manure (poop)....
So if you life is feeling poopy, crappy, and not good....remember:
THE MOST BEAUTIFUL FLOWERS GROW OUT OF MANURE

sometimes the most messed up situations were actually preparing you and putting you in a place for greatness...
the most messed up and bad relationships.....that you felt caused so much heartache, had to be broken so you could actually find your "REAL" true love...
the most backwards steps, away from your dreams, were actually lining you up just right to really achieve them....
the most heartbreaking day.....was growing your heart, for the biggest blessing that needed more room in your heart to fill up!!!

So...if your day is crappy, say HOORAY...something good is gonna' grow out of this poop! ha ha ha

typed with huge amounts of love, kandee

and now to finish it off with a messy, fast, hair video.....happy hair!

okayyyyy

(this is a picture of me...not behind bars...ha ha ha ha...I'm in front of bars.....hee hee)
I was going to post my blog about why I was in court....but I was "advised" that this might not be such a good idea yet.....you all love me and wouldn't believe any of this nonsense....and wouldn't judge me, but since this is the worldwide web, i might have to wait to post it.....today one of the things that made me happy was editing this video!
Please enjoy this, until I can tell you what is going on....
I love you all hugely....and thank you so much for you love and support!!!
typed with love and thanks....kandee

ENJOY THIS VIDEO that made me happy, making it for you!!!!!

I got......

FANNNNNSSSSSS.....
I can't tell you how exciting it is to have someone come up and tell you how excited they are to meet you!!! It makes me so excited to meet them too!!!!
Last night when I went to have dinner with my girls...I was asked:
Are you Kandee Johnson?
me: yes!!!! (in my high pitched- 4 year old voice...I don't like my voice!ha ha ha)
She then tells me her friend asked her to go and stop me...hee hee hee
(PS, It was so great to meet you Rachel and friends!!! Hope your dinner was yummy too!)
And the day before in Forever 21 I got "recognized", and asked for my picture too!

I felt like a princess or something! So if you ever see me anywhere, please feel free to come up to me and say hi, I will give you a huge hug! I promise!

If in anything...in any moment, stirs inside you to do something.....DO IT! I was talking to my mom today, and we were talking about, how sometimes you need to just do things. Don't think about them too much, don't plan things out so much, it steals the time away from just DOING that thing you want to do!

I know people that plan so much, that's all they do is plan, and they never DO anything! One day, I just filmed my little video on how to clean your brushes (my first video on youtube), I did my first attempt at editing a video, and posted that little guy! If I had planned it out so much, I would've said, "well no, I need a website first", "I don't even have a logo", "who's gonna watch it?", "what if no one looks at the video?"...."I should, I should, I should....."....
NO! I just uploaded it...DOING IS WHERE IT'S AT! Without DOING something, it doesn't matter what you plan....so to steal Nike's slogan: "JUST DO IT!"

Your it can be anything:
telling someone something
starting a new career
changing a habit
getting in shape
going after your dreams
dressing how you want
changing your hair
ANYTHING!

Just DO SOMETHING this week that maybe you've been putting off...just one little "I DID IT!!!", this week, and watch what happens! huge love, your kandee.....

I get to PREMIERE something!

oh my! oh my white rabbit! Get ready to glam it up at a tea party..with URBAN DECAY's fabulous new book of eyeshadows...that is celebrating Disney's Alice In Wonderland movie....

the girls at Urban Decay, sent me this adorable little treasure to show all of you before it comes out!!!! It came in a box with a little bottle of Godiva White chocolate sauce with a tag that said: DRINK ME...a little "giant" pill case, with mints...and a beautiful mug with a "K" on it! It was like an adventure just opening it!!!

I immediately smacked these colors on my lids....these colors create the most beautiful smokey eye....and just wait til I play around with the colors!!!! This is an AWESOME deal to get all these colors, the eye primer, 2 eye liners....and all these beautiful, pigmented colors!!!

Thanks so much to Kat at Urban Decay for sending this to me! I was like a little girl at Christmas opening this!!! I love it!!!

YOU CAN GET ONE TOO!!!! This little gem comes out JANUARY 15th at www.urbandecay.com...
get yours before they are all gone, like a white rabbit, down a rabbit hole!!!!



and here's some of the ALICE in WOnderland looks I've done already!



have a fun and dazzling day, kandee